The never ending story

Unfinished business

MugsRYou the firm that turned ordinary books into multi-volume encyclopaedias by using large print, an increased number of uninteresting images and a minimal number of pages in each volume, has gone out of business.

Lawrie Driver working for MugsRYou deliveries said: “I’m gutted.”

It is difficult to understand how a company who makes a fortune from the people who decide to collect these overpriced books, could possibly go bust, but these are difficult times.

Both of the gullible fools in Petersfield who had decided to collect the tome have already paid for and collected 16 parts of what was to be a 24-part series. That amounts to exactly two thirds of the expected information, costing a princely £47.84.

We did manage to get hold of Paddy Towt, ex-managing director of MugsRYou, who seemed shell-shocked at the turn of events.

“It is all very unfortunate,” Towt told Newswire. “For those people that were following the story I think I owe it to them to point out that they are not really missing very much; it’s mainly fighting.

“If our customers are wondering how it ends, the Americans eventually join the fray late on in book 23, there’s an explosive finale and the allies go on to win in the end.”

Out of Focus

The shelves haven't even been cleared and the

Coffee Warehouse people are in
 

Petersfield is set to have the UK ’s largest coffee shop following the demise of the DIY chain Focus.

The Focus store, in Station Road , is set to be bought by a consortium of coffee growers and transformed into Coffee Warehouse – a venue for buying coffee beans and enjoying a fresh brew.

Ken Cogold, the chairman of Coffee Warehouse, said: “The sad demise of Focus has proved an unmissable opportunity for us. It’s clear there is a huge demand for coffee shops in Petersfield – and that demand is not being met.

“We anticipate giving over half the available floor space to coffee bean storage and the other half to a coffee shop. It’s sort of a wholesale Whittard’s … and we’ll piss all over them.

“There is a small outside area where our customers can drink al fresco and we will be the only coffee shop in town with dedicated parking facilities. What’s more, our close proximity to the town’s railway station means we will expect a lot of commuter traffic early on, so we will open at 6am and remain open until 10pm during the summer months.

“The future of Petersfield is in coffee – that much is clear. And if it doesn’t work out, we’ll turn over the storage area into a charity shop.”

He added: “If anybody wants to buy a screwdriver they can head down to B&Q at Havant where they will find other working-class people.”