Friday, August 05, 2011

Petersfield time capsule hangs in balance

David Weeks' shiny suit could be buried under Petersfield square

Plans to bury a time capsule under Petersfield’s town square hang in the balance after officials could not decide what to include.

Initially, council officials wanted local residents to suggest ideas but a straw poll in the square this week revealed the majority of people had nothing contemporaneous to offer up as most had merely been waiting in the Post Office queue since 2005.

One councillor has faced calls to resign – pronounced “Resign!” – after he suggested burying Bordon, while others believe that rather than bury items, in such a precarious economic climate the town’s chattels should be sold off at a car-boot sale.

A popular choice for burial would appear to be David Weeks’ shiny suit – although Weeks himself is apparently reluctant to part with it.

Another suggestion, which would illustrate the plight of the homeless in the early 21st century, would be to include Mona, the Big Issue seller.

Cllr Ivan Idea added: “We need to include things that represent Petersfield in 2011, so I suggest we cram the box with toy cars so there’s no room for much else. We could squeeze in some pizza delivery leaflets, one of those plastic collection bags distributed by the myriad charity shops in the town and a loan application form showing the extent to which some people would go to buy a round of coffees in Costa.

“Waitrose has kindly offered to supply us with some sun-drenched tomatoes to illustrate the town’s eating habits, while we will also include a vial of water from the lake just in case somebody in 2111 has come up with a cure for those bloody algae.”

Not everybody is in favour of burying a capsule, however. Cllr Kerr Mudgeon insists the town square already has a sealed time capsule.

He said: “The Market Inn pub has been sealed up for as long as I can remember and there seems no likelihood of it being reopened. I would therefore suggest we leave that as the town’s time capsule and just decorate the outside, perhaps with some paint or something.

“I’m sure, if it was opened up in 100 years time – or later if the economy hasn’t picked up by then – the contents would be very interesting: some empty beer cans, the odd used prophylactic, empty syringes, BNP newsletters and some copies of the Daily Mail all left by the last customers to leave.

“It would be fascinating. And almost certainly the news agenda and stories in the Daily Mail would be very similar, if not identical, to today.”

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