Saturday, October 10, 2009

A break from the norm


Thousands of pounds worth of damage
was inflicted during the break-in

Two men have been arrested by police on suspicion of breaking into the Adam & Eve It Gastro Bar, in Petersfield High Street.

The men are charged with stealing £300 and causing damage on the premises running into thousands of pounds.

"We were not stealing the money" said Arthur Stout, one of the offenders. "We were taking the money as a token payment for the plumbing work that we carried out."

It is claimed that Stout, 56 and Paddy Gree, 52 both life-long residents of Petersfield, had actually fitted barrels and piping to facilitate the sale of real ale on the premises. The work was estimated by detectives to be worth several thousand pounds.

"They've actually done a great job and the beer is coming through perfectly, in tip-top condition," said PC Swiller.

Bar owner Oliver Lyminit was angered by these comments and said: "We don't want real ale here; it really doesn't fit our business model.

"Our clients spill out on to the pavement blocking the path for pedestrians, kicking footballs around on the High Street and parking their souped-up cars and mopeds as close to the door as they can with their engines running. Our customers are designer lager drinkers and this "installation" is simply an act of mindless vandalism."

A date for the case to be heard will be set when the Crown Prosecution Service can be arsed...

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